Dear Dad,
For more than a year, I had been wanting to take the Introduction to Outdoor Leader Skills course so that I could complete my Assistant Scoutmaster Training for Boy Scouts, but G3’s schedule has been so busy I hadn’t been able to escape for a weekend to do it. Last weekend, however, I had nothing planned, so I registered for it. It is a two day, one night, camping event. The organizers of the training sent out a packing list, and I followed it religiously. It said I needed a watch and compass, both of which I didn’t own, so I ordered them. After all, the Boy Scout motto is, “Be Prepared.” The program also required me to have a uniform, which I don’t own, and since I registered last minute, I didn’t even have time to go shopping. Therefore, I borrowed my son’s. Serendipitously, we bought him a new one last month and Kati had not yet had time to transfer his patches onto it. I figured a patchless uniform was better than nothing. The very last line of the list said cell phones were not allowed and that we needed to leave them behind. It seemed to make some sense. Phones could enable us to cheat, and so I didn’t question it. I needed the phone’s GPS to get me to the campsite, but once there, I figured it was easy enough to leave it in the glove compartment of my car. But first, I told Kati and my mother that I would be phoneless all weekend. If they called me, I wouldn’t be able to respond until sometime on Sunday afternoon.
As luck would have it, another parent from the Troop–the father of one of G3’s friends–was also taking the course, so we carpooled. Since we had to be at the campground at seven AM on Saturday morning, I picked him up at six, we grabbed some coffee, and then got on the road. We arrived four minutes early, but the volunteers running the program didn’t get there until 7:30. By the time we finally checked in–making sure all our paperwork was in order–it was nearing 8:30. At that point, they divided us into three patrols–or groups. We named our patrol the Green Goats and from the start the five of us seemed to get along well enough–that says a lot, since you know how difficult it is for me to get along with others.
I didn’t really know what to expect from the weekend. I’ve camped a great deal and back before G3 was born I did a fair amount of backpacking. But I knew there were gaps in my knowledge and I was happy to fill them. Our first class of the day was knots and lashings. It’s a good thing we weren’t getting graded or I might have failed. I tried really hard, but I still couldn’t get a single knot tied correctly on my first attempt. Unfortunately, we were only at each station for ten minutes, not nearly enough for me to get comfortable with any of the knots or lashings. I wish I had more time, because repetition would have made a difference. I needed to be able to sit and repeat the steps multiple times in order to reach a level of comfort.
Next, we moved on to the best techniques to use when teaching Scouts how to use wood tools–hatches and saws. That was followed up by a tutorial on how to cook using a Dutch oven. What I liked best about that was we got to practice the skills we learned when we cooked dinner. Our patrol had to make a chicken stew/casserole thing using a Dutch oven and coals. We also needed to make a pineapple upside down cake. The food came out okay. I’m not a fan of chicken–I ate it to be less difficult–nor do I care for cake. But it was all edible and we didn’t burn any of it.
The nature walk was fun, because you know how much I like to walk, but we didn’t learn all that much. The guide pointed out deer tracks in the mud and he identified the leaves of several trees. Of the ones he drew out attention to, poison ivy was the most valuable. That’s the one you want to make sure you can identify so that you can educate scouts to be sure they don’t end up with an evil itchy rash.
I was surprised by how much I enjoyed doing the ridiculous skits around the campfire. Previously, I have always thought they were silly and on every scout camping trip I dreaded them, but being forced into performing them gave me a different perspective. I laughed more than I had in awhile which felt really good.
Day two started early. I was up just before dawn and I broke down my tent by seven o’clock. Breakfast was bland–oatmeal cookies and hard boiled eggs. But ever since I went hiking in Peru, many years ago, hard boiled eggs have been one of my favorite camping/backpacking foods. Apparently, I was the only one in my patrol who liked them so I had more than enough to fill me up. After we ate, we had an introductory orienteering lesson. It’s the lesson I was most looking forward to, because I finally learned how to properly use a compass. Sure, there is still a great deal I do not know–there’s only so much that can be crammed into a one hour session–but at least I won’t feel silly packing a compass for weekend outings when the packing list suggests I do so.
Following orienteering was a discussion about packing for a backpacking trip. As you know, before G3 was born, I lived to go backpacking. Therefore, much of the discussion covered things I already knew. My experiences, though different from the presenter’s, are extensive enough that I feel confident in my packing ability. However, technology has advanced since I last packed a rucksack and took off exploring, so I appreciated the upgraded ideas. For instance, instead of packing my clothes in individual ziplock bags–which is great for compartmentalizing, which you know I love to do, but also imperative if you want to keep your things dry in the rain–I am now going to buy lightweight dry bags to use, predominantly because they are more environmental than plastic.
It turned out my friend and I were the only ones who left our phones in the car on Saturday. At one point or another, everyone else had taken their phones out to take pictures, check email, or send text messages. Since I was the only one who either read or followed the directions, it seemed silly not to make a trip to my car to get my phone. While I had told everyone–specifically Kati and Mom–that I would be completely cut off, I had a gut feeling that not having my phone was a bad idea. Sure enough, on Sunday morning, just as we were getting ready for our orienteering lesson, Mom called. She was in the hospital. The night before, she had been volunteering at church and she fell down the dark stairs. Other parishioners found her and called an ambulance. The fall resulted in a broken collar bone, a broken shoulde rblade, and multiple broken ribs, one of which pierced her lung. Miraculously, she did not break a hip, but the knee she had replaced last year blew up, and she is not sure if it sustained any damage in the fall.
Since it had happened the night before and she was already admitted into the hospital, I finished my training–there were only a couple of hours remaining. However, once it was done, I drove my friend home, stopped at my house to shower, and then drove into New York. The absolute last thing I felt like doing was sitting in traffic–and there is always traffic–but I wanted to get eyes on Mom to see how bad she looked, and I needed to bring her a phone charger since her battery was nearly dead. She didn’t look too bad, the hospital staff made her comfortable, but she couldn’t move.
As if that wasn’t bad enough, yesterday was your wedding anniversary–the fourth one Mom had without you. Spending it alone in the hospital had to have been even more depressing. I wish she lived closer, because then I’d be able to stop in to visit every day. With her in New York and me having to work in New Jersey, going to visit, even a half hour, would take no less than five hours, most of which would be sitting in traffic. And the next several weekends are busy with things I have committed to for Boy Scouts and Taekwondo. I have practically begged her to move closer to me so that I could take care of her in situations such as this, but she wants to stay in New York where she has developed a circle of friends. I understand her need for friends, but then when something like this happens, I can’t be there. Since she can’t be home alone with all of her injuries, they are transferring her to a rehab center. Again, if she lived closer, I’d be able to stop in every day to get her food, do her laundry, and run any other errands she might need. But I can’t afford to quit my job or take too much time off.
However, I have to take a day off tomorrow. Mom needs clothes, and no one else can get them for her. I have to go to her house, pack her suitcase, and bring it to her since she doesn’t know when she will be able to go home. My brother doesn’t want to help me convince her to move to New Jersey. He thinks it’s best for her to stay where her friends are. But it’s easy for him because he lives further away. He’s not the one sitting in traffic, every time something happens to Mom.
Anyway, I wish you were here. If you were, she probably wouldn’t have fallen because she wouldn’t have been at church. And if you were here, I’d have been able to call you up to talk about my Boy Scout training. I would have enjoyed that a great deal, and I suspect you would have enjoyed hearing about it.
I still miss you very much!!
Elizabeth Jaeger 